A Quick Thought About Anti-Social Douchebags

You’ll often notice guys in airports, washrooms, cafés, etc., talking loud on their phones, disrupting conversations everywhere.

You’ll also often notice that these are often powerful-looking guys: business-types, tall maybe, expensive phones, etc. In fact, you might even have a situation in mind. I know I can think of a few.

Sometimes, these scenes go on for a long time– so long that everyone around them starts looking around at each other. Knowing glances pass between tables.

Then, everyone kind of shrugs, thinking “well, what can you do?”

Watch a scene like this sometime– you won’t have to wait long before it happens. Everyone wants to tell these guys to shut up, but nobody does. No one steps up to the plate because no one wants to be “that asshole,” or because they’re embarrassed or don’t want to be told off.

But these scenes aren’t just random acts of social violence. None of it is not a coincidence. The reason these guys have these symbols of success is because they have balls. They’re willing to do what other people aren’t, have extreme confidence, and get by because of it. It’s why these guys get where they are today, why they have the expensive clothes, the phones, and the loud voice.

They flaunt their status and ignore social cues that their behaviour is undesired. Maybe they feel they’ve earned the right to do so, I dunno.

But no one ever told them no.

This happened to me one time on the Camino de Santiago with an old German guy. He was talking on his phone really loud in a dormitory filled with about 50 people. Everyone was looking at him. They wanted to sleep, but he didn’t care.

I walked up to him in my underwear, about 60+ hours of tattoo work in full view, and gestured for him to fucking close his phone immediately.

He left the room. People started laughing. Everyone was grateful.

Please take this story to heart.

Nobody else will ever say anything, ever. It has to be you.


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5 responses to “A Quick Thought About Anti-Social Douchebags”

  1. Brianne Avatar

    Just curious… do you see this concept of ‘balls’ applying to women in the same way it applies to men? If so, do you find that the behavior generally produces the same result for men and for women?

    1. Julien Avatar

      Brianne, of course! Read this as a follow-up, you’ll see what I mean.

      http://www.shirky.com/weblog/2010/01/a-rant-about-women/

      1. Brianne Avatar

        Great link! Thanks!

  2. dang tin Avatar

    Great post, after reading it yesterday , I called to my “long time no seen” friends and they were very glad to meet me, and I had the best evening for a long time.

  3. Debbie Avatar
    Debbie

    True and good observation but I was wondering if also if alot of these Ballsy corporate types that are described might be psychopaths as well. So I think I need to reconnect with my inner ball child but have to realize I’ll never really be able to cheat or lie my way to the top.

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