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Archive for the 'rant' Category

If You Build It, They Won't Give a @#$%

Tuesday, August 14th, 2012

Welcome to the densest, most competitive information marketplace in history. Never before have people been so ready to send out more marketing messages. Never in history have people cared less. Just five seconds ago I was invited to yet another religious Facebook group for a religion I’m not even a part of. Gee, thanks. You […]

NEWSFLASH: This isn't my little fucking pony

Thursday, September 15th, 2011

Tweeting is not a business model. Rainbows and unicorns will not cut it. The universe doesn’t care about you. Its natural state is to want to wipe you off the planet. You are temporary. In fact, for a large portion of the planet, you are food. Is social media is the new real estate? Everyone’s […]

Just send the goddamn email

Thursday, March 17th, 2011

You know you’ve been delaying it. You know it needs to get done. It’s on the top of your list, and yet somehow, you just never manage to make it happen. You’ve been saying it isn’t the right time, or telling people that you just got overwhelmed. But you know what? Today is the day. It’s […]

Advanced Tactics in Saying No

Monday, March 7th, 2011

Saying no should be required learning for the 21st century. Why? Because we are soft. We have become so through a series of coercion methods that have been used on us since we were infants. So we are eased into it by our parents and our peer groups, and by a variety of authorities that […]

How To Recognize an Idiot

Monday, December 27th, 2010

Do you have a New Year’s resolution you wish more people would make? I do. I wish we would stop acting like we know what we’re talking about, even when we don’t. Everyone is so proud of their ignorance in this world that it baffles me. So can everyone just do me a personal favour […]

Stop being a fucking pussy

Friday, December 3rd, 2010

Ok, you want to be successful. You think you’re trying your hardest. Dammit you are pretty sure you’re gunning for it, really hard! But here is the truth: You’re not. In every industry, there is an edge. In your business or personal life, it doesn’t matter– somewhere, there is a cliff. Most people don’t want […]

The Quick, 12-Step Guide to Quitting That @#$%ing Job You Hate

Monday, November 29th, 2010

Guess what, it’s Monday! And you’re still at that job you hate. Nice. 1. 9am. Get to the office. Go straight to the coffee machine. Hang out there for 10 minutes before heading to your desk. Dread the workweek. 2. 9:10am. Check Facebook and email, despite having just done so on your iPhone 15 minutes […]

How to Make Popular/Influential Friends

Monday, November 22nd, 2010

There are three ways to make popular friends. First, you can meet them before they’re popular. This isn’t exactly obvious. You could be strategic about it (being in high a high growth industry or something), that might get kind of douchey. Second, you can meet them in exclusive places. The limited guest list means they […]

No, you do not need my phone number.

Saturday, November 20th, 2010

If I’ve bought something from your website, you already have me. You don’t need my information to send me more stuff later on. That’s not what I’m buying. I’m buying this book, and that’s it. Last week I typed into a captcha field ten times, and I never got it right. Eventually, I gave up. […]

You Do Not Have an MBA

Thursday, August 12th, 2010

If you’re John Doe, there are a lot of hoops for you to jump through if you want to become Dr. John Doe. Between Jane Doe and Jane the lawyer, there are hoops, too. In both cases they’re pretty important to go through a certain way. This is not the case with an MBA. But […]